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The Spanko Mother Goose
Old Mother Goose

by Kyle Nazard

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Copyright on this story text belongs at all times to the original author only, whether stated explicitly in the text or not. The original date of posting to the MMSA was: 15 Mar 2012


By Kyle Nazard

Old Mother Goose,
When she wanted to wander,
Would ride through the air
On a very fine gander.
Jack's father came in,
And caught the goose soon,
And mounting its back,
Flew up to the moon.

The hot water cascading down Ian's naked body was so refreshing. He felt so much more awake now and his penis had certainly woken up! His mind was not on showering as he rubbed his mighty erection under the flowing water. He was thinking of his bum, his glorious bum and his other hand was lathering the soft, smooth skin of his big but beautiful buttocks. Thoughts of his buttocks on show, being spanked, being humiliated, being used, filled his mind and a second shower, a shower of thick juicy cum, joined the main flow and was washed away down the plughole.

Ian quickly dried himself and was about to run across the landing back to his bedroom when he heard his father coming up the stairs. He smartly wrapped a small towel round his mid-portion and walked calmly out of the bathroom. “Morning, dad.”

“Morning, son,” his dad answered, sounding so cheerful. He was whistling to himself. “Lovely day,” he added, slapping his hand onto Ian's left buttock and giving it a friendly squeeze.

Ian felt his face blush. “You sound happy,” he managed to say, trying to cover his embarrassment.

“I've got an acting job at last! An important part in a local pantomime.”

“Good, good,” Ian hurriedly replied, making a quick getaway into his bedroom.

“I told the producer I'd bring you along to audition,” Ian's father shouted through the door, “You free today?”

“Yes, dad,” Ian shouted back, feeling quite excited. He'd often fancied performing on the stage. Hoped it would give him an opportunity to show off his prominent bottom!


“Haaaloooo Robert, love,” this very camp voice sung, as they arrived at the theatre. “How are you darling? So lovely to see you again. And this must be your gorgeous son. Wonderful. Ooo this is going to be such a fabuloso production!” This strange, almost female looking man virtually danced to his singing voice and his limp wrist movements seemed so exaggerated.

“Yes, this is Ian,” Robert managed to get in.

“Eeee-an,” the producer shrieked, shaking Ian's hand. “Your sweet father has told us all about you. I can see he's certainly right about your bum, luvvie.” He had a good maul of Ian's buttocks. “You are just perfect for the part, darling. I almost want to fuck it myself and I normally prefer it the other way round, if you know what I mean?” He let out a most strange high-pitched laugh and his bare feet in flip-flops just wouldn't keep still.

Poor Ian was just totally befuddled. What was going on? Who was this chap? And what was his father doing talking about his son's bottom to other people?

“This is Jocelyn, by the way,” Robert told Ian, “The producer.”

“And director,” Jocelyn quickly added. “I'm forced into both roles – top and bottom.” He waved his hands in the air, screaming another silly laugh. “But do call me 'Jock', everyone else does – after my favourite article of clothing!” He pulled out the waistband of his track suit trousers and pinged the elastic of his jock strap. “I like leather ones too,” he said, raising his eyebrows amusingly. “Come in and meet the rest of the cast and crew.”

Ian wondered what he was getting into and whispered to his father, “What is the panto?”

“Oh don't you know,” Jocelyn jumped straight in, obviously overhearing Ian's question. “It's 'Old Mother Goose' – or the spanko mother goose as we would have liked to have called it.” He laughed again. “Your dad says he still spanks you, darling. Ooo lucky you, that's what I say. Anyway it's a GOOSE production.” He ran his hand along the G.O.O.S.E written across his bright orange T-shirt. “The Gay Organisation On Social Entertainment,” he explained, quite seriously.

“So it's a gay panto?” Ian asked.

“Oh darling. Didn't you know?,” came the reply, “Not for kids this, Oooo NO! Adults only – hilarious raunchy spanko and gay sex stuff.”

Ian looked at his dad, who now seemed rather embarrassed, and didn't know what to say.

“Well, it's a job,” his dad whispered, “And it'll give us a chance to work together and make that father and son bond.”

“Come and have a gander at my boys,” Jocelyn called from up on stage.

Six gorgeous Adonises appeared out of nowhere, as Robert and Ian stepped onto the stage; all, like Ian, in their early twenties.

“Aren't they just adorable?” Jocelyn screeched, kissing one on the cheek. “I love them all so much. Just you wait till you see them in costume.” The six all laughed in unison because they knew that 'costume' meant no costume at all.

“Bloody Hell, Jock,” one of the men exclaimed, “You didn't tell us that the goose was going to have such a fantastic arse. I think we should goose that bum not the other way round.”

What does it mean to 'goose a bum'? Ian wondered.

“Ha,” Jocelyn laughed, “That's Robert's job but there'll be some opportunity for you all to have a play of these magnificent mounds.” His hands 'goosed' Ian's buttocks accompanied by a particularly camp, “oooooo”. Jocelyn turned to the six. “Right, boys, show us your opening number. Music please.”

Ian found out later that these lads were called 'The Six Spankos' – three of them spanked and three were spanked. At this stage, he had no idea they would perform naked, he just watched them clothed on an empty stage. He thought it rather puerile but it had its funny moments and they were certainly well choreographed. In time to the music, the first cart-wheeled on stage and sang, “My name's Jack and here's my crack,” he waggled his backside, “I like my bum to feel a smack!” The second came up behind singing, “Hi, I'm Jock and with this cock,” he thrust out his groin, “I like to give that arse a fock.” He pointed to Jack's bum. Ian couldn't help but titter at the word 'fock', it was the expression on Jock's face as he said it.

As the first pair stepped to one side, the next Spanko minced his way to the front of the stage. “Hey! I'm Duane and I live down the lane. On my bum I love the cane.” A very deep voice came straight in, “And I am Shane and with this cane, I will thrash his bum again.” Ian had to admit it was well done and very entertaining. The fifth lad slid down a rope. “Hi, I'm Martin, I'm always fartin',” he held his nose, “I love it when my bum is smartin'.” And finally, in a monotoned voice “Good evening everybody, I am call-ed Roger and I'm here tonight to show you what I do with my todger. I take it like this and give Martin a jolly good..” he hesitated just perfectly, looking thoughtful, before completing, “Thingey!”

The music stopped and the other five shouted “Thingey?” in unison. Roger just shrugged his shoulders and the music started again for a lively dance with demonstrations of spanking and caning until they all, one by one, left the stage, the final three clasping their buttocks as they went.


At first, Ian was horrified when he found out, firstly, he'd got the part without an audition and, secondly, what he had to do – it was the lead part – Mother Goose himself, yes HIMself! All eyes would be on him and, mainly, his bum. He loved the idea of that but wasn't so sure about it in reality. The early rehearsals were unbelievably embarrassing. As he went along, he learned he had to pretend to fuck some of the Spankos and the climax of the show was his dad belting his bare arse before fucking him – all to be performed in public. It was embarrassing enough rehearsing it with those few present, especially his dad but, at the same time, it was exciting.

Rehearsals carried on at home; his dad always wanting an excuse to play with his son's gorgeous bum and his dad had been right, it was strengthening the bond between them. Ian became more confident of showing off his greatest asset and was more relaxed with his dad. He actually enjoyed the regular spanking and building his bottom up to get used to the thick leather belt. It really stung but somehow he loved it. And once he got into the part, he forgot it was his own father pretending to fuck him but just a fellow actor performing his role.

After many weeks of learning the lines; practising how to move; where to stand; how to attach a harness, quickly and safely; how to fly around the stage and how the spankings and final leathering would take place, it was time for the costume fit. And what a day that was. Ian was wondering what his costume would be. Would he actually look like a goose? He just burst out laughing when he saw it. If he had seen it at the beginning he would have said 'no' but now, knowing the whole set up and all the people involved, he was game for a laugh and without any hesitation, he stripped completely naked and pulled on a pair of bright yellow tights that clung to every contour of his legs, genitals and, of course, buttocks. He was sure he looked stupid but that was part of the fun. He needed help to get into the thickly padded white fluffy bodice, which ended in a stubby, pointed tail. When he bent over the tail would stick up and his bright yellow bottom came into full view. He wasn't required to wear a goose's head, thank goodness. He was meant to be a man dressed as a goose and Jocelyn felt seeing a man's head would remind the audience of this.

It was their first rehearsal in costume that Ian saw the sexy fit bodies of the Six Spankos and he was worried he'd be performing the whole pantomime with a hard on – phwoarrr!! The rehearsal went well, the costume made him feel more in character and towards the end when he had to bend over for his dad, his tights decided to split just at the perfect moment. Suddenly two beautifully rounded buttocks were making an entrance centre stage.

Jocelyn halted proceedings with an ear-splitting, “Oh my God!” as he minced up onto the stage. “That was soooo unbelievable, darling. My heart's all a flutter. Absolutely fatastico.” He had a good fondle of the superb bottom protruding from the split tights. “Arnold, darling,” he called.

“I'm here,” the chap in charge of costumes shouted from the stalls. “I saw it all; the way those wondrous buttocks made their entrance.” He, too, was making his way onto the stage. “Don't worry, Jock, I know what you want. You want this to happen every time. Well, I can stitch it loosely so it will and can show Ian where to pull if it doesn't happen automatically.” He was happily fondling the said buttocks.

“Oh Arnold, you are such a love,” Jocelyn responded and kissed him on the cheek.


After weeks of rehearsals, the opening night crept up upon them and Ian felt he was more scared than he had ever been in his life. He stood, trembling, at the side, off stage, watching the six naked men performing their opening number amongst the attractive scenery of a pretty forest. He could hear much laughter and cheering and hoped it was going down well but all sorts of questions were spinning around his mind. Would he remember his lines? Would his tights split at the right moment? Would he get the harness on properly so he could fly around the stage? Would people laugh at the right moments. Did he really dare bare his bum in public? He was lost in his thoughts until Jocelyn tapped him on the shoulder. “Ten seconds,” he told Ian, “nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two and,” he gave Ian a little encouraging shove.

The scariest moment had arrived. He put his finger above his top lip and nervously walked on stage doing his Basil Fawlty Hitler impression. He stopped centre stage, the bright lights all on him. He stared into the audience and said, “Well what do you expect? I am a goose and these are goose-steps!” The audience roared with laughter and somehow that settled Ian down, he was most relieved. “I thought I'd wander the woods today. I hope it brings me luck. Perhaps I'll find a bottom so gay, With a hole just ripe to ....?”

“For c...rying out loud!” Jack shouted on cue, his head popping up from behind a bush and disappearing just as quickly.

Ian went straight into the well-rehearsed routine of looking behind the trees and bushes and heads (or other parts) of Spankos popped up here and there, with the audience shouting, “Behind you!” etc. until he found Jack and decided that he would ride him. He had a good 'goose' of Jack's bum, to lots more cheering, before carefully, and virtually unseen, attaching the harness to them both and flying off, looking as if he was fucking him. He had to admit the feeling of his tightly covered penis nestling in Jack's crack was very nice indeed.

As the curtains closed, Ian and Jack landed safely and Ian had a nice rest while his father took over. Robert was playing Jack's father and in the next scene, he goes into the woods to find Jack and chastises him and all his friends. Jack tells him about the old goose that keeps pestering them and his father tells Jack to call him the next time it happens. The whole scene lasts longer than it sounds with lots of dancing, spanking fun, and loads of sexual innuendos! Everyone got a rest after that for the interval and Jocelyn was over the moon about how it had gone so far.

The second half began like the first but Ian goose-stepped in from the other side. He had another play with five of the six Spankos and was just about to ride off on one when Jack waddled onto stage. He looked shocked at seeing the goose and, from between his buttocks, to much laughter, retrieved his mobile phone and called his dad. Robert rushed on stage and there was a fantastically funny choreographed chase scene until Ian was eventually caught.

Ian was brought to the front of the stage by his dad, who turned him round and started to smack his yellow bottom, ordering him to bend over. It all happened perfectly. Ian bent down and touched his toes and the material gave way. He felt his buttocks push through into the open. He heard whoops of laughter and cheering. He felt himself go red. It was embarrassing but he was enjoying being the centre of attention. It was great to hear his own father commenting to the whole audience about the magnificent mounds and his hands really 'goosed' that bum, accompanied with lots of jokes about goosing to the others on stage.

“This is a very naughty goose,” Robert declared, “I don't think I should turn him loose but should I take my leather belt and on that bum create a welt?” Of course the whole audience shouted 'YES' and all the Spankos gathered round urging Jack's father to belt the naughty goose. Robert slipped his belt out of his trousers; a thick leather belt, and held it up. The atmosphere was electric. The whole house was willing the man to whip that arse and whip it he did.

Ian felt the doubled-up belt lash against his bare flesh. A mighty sting grew across the whole of his backside. It took his breath away. In rehearsals he father hadn't struck as hard as this but the crowd had urged him onwards and another stroke punished the exposed buttocks. The audience shouted for more and more came. The heat was really building in that gorgeous big bottom, eye wateringly so, but Ian was actually loving it. The thought of hundreds of people watching his bare buttocks being thrashed was really turning him on and he could tell everyone was enjoying this spectacle. Thick red lines were building on his skin and still the spectators called for more. His father was very good though and kept it to twelve as agreed but they turned out to be a very painful twelve. Ian was quite proud of himself for keeping pretty still throughout the ordeal and bearing the punishing pain.

With his bum still burning hot, the Six Spankos each came up and goosed the bum, adding a few hand smacks. This was mainly to distract the audience from the attaching of a wire to Ian and his father. Ian was surprised at the s